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Tuesday, March 26, 2019

The Problem Is You Let Her Fall For You

Relatable think piece & could also be vice versa. The question is, how can we get this type to STOP trying to date? Or when he or she recognizes this behavior, have a conversation?


The Problem Is You Let Her Fall For You
By Kirsten Corley, May 17th 2017


The problem is you knew exactly how she felt about you from the start. You knew that you couldn’t reciprocate it. But you still let her fall.

Maybe you thought you were being nice. Maybe there was comfort in having her there but while she was trying so hard to be what you needed she was falling even harder for you.

And maybe you didn’t think much of the little things but it was those things that meant everything to her.

It was the time you got to spend together, where maybe you thought twice about her and the relationship.

She felt it too and she knows it wasn’t a one-sided feeling. Something like that was too strong to be.

It was eye contact that lasted longer than it should have.

It was a hug or a simple gesture as your arm brushed against her and she felt it from her head to her toes and electric feeling of something that was there.

It was looking at her across the room and she knew you were watching her.

It was in that moment she mustered the courage to say I love you and seconds felt like hours as her face got red waiting but then you said it back.

It was every text you sent her when you thought of her as you saw something.

It was every snap chat you sent just to let her know, I’m doing this and thinking of you.

It was every time she left and you told her you missed her.

It was every time you said every right thing. You knew exactly what you were doing.

You made her think she had a chance with you.

It was every song and book you shared, that she replayed or reread because she liked thinking of you.

It was the likes and tags and comments, that she woke up to smiling just seeing your name on her screen.

It was every time you posted something, she knew you wanted her to see it but what she didn’t know was why.

Because here you were attempting to get her attention when in reality you had it this whole time.

But the thing was you weren’t making any moves or trying.

Instead, you just let her live in this limbo of maybes and what ifs.

And while you were fumbling through confusion, she was growing more confident in how she felt.

Maybe you weren’t ready for someone like her. But the world doesn’t ask if you’re ready to meet the right person, they just bring you to them and hope you realize how lucky you are and act accordingly.

But you didn’t.

So instead of her walking away, she stayed. A stream of questions ran through her mind wondering why she wasn’t good enough for you. Wondering what she could have done more. Fixating upon flaws because obviously, it was her not good enough.

Then you had the nerve to turn around and make her feel guilty for feeling these things for you.

Like it was her fault she fell in love with you but in reality, you led her to feel all these things.

You led someone on who would never hurt you or do the same.

The worst thing you can do is let someone fall for you and not be there to catch them.

You can’t simply touch someone’s heart, become so close then wonder why they feel a certain way about you.

That’s not fair.

That girl loved you. She loved you enough to go along with whatever this thing was that you claim wasn’t anything. She loved you enough to not say anything about how she felt but quietly try and be what you need. Then she loved you enough to tell you when she thought the time was right only to be met with rejection and you confused.

If you’re confused about why she feels this way imagine how confused she is wondering why you don’t, as she replays in her mind how she misread all those signals.

And now she’ll love you enough to not chase you after you freaked the fuck out about how she felt.

She loves you enough to let you go because she’s still trying to be selfless here, as she picks up the pieces of her broken heart smiling at you and saying no unkind words as you go.

Because she still loves you. And you don’t see it yet but the heart that loves when you break theirs is the person you end up missing most.

Kirsten Corley

Kirsten is the author of But Before You Leave, a book of poetry about the experiences we struggle to put into words


https://thoughtcatalog.com/kirsten-corley/2017/05/the-problem-is-you-let-her-fall-for-you

Thursday, December 20, 2018

USED TO BE MY GIRL



LYRICS:
Good loving
The girls got pretty good lovin'
Ask me how I know
And I'll tell you so..
She used to be my girl
My Giiirl

I respect her
When she was mine
I used to neglect her
She wanted more than I could give
But as long as I live
She'll be my girl

Chorus:
She used to be my girl
She used to be my girl

She had a charming personality
The girl was so right for me
Shes my girl

And If I had the chance
I'd take her back
As a matter a fact
Right away
Like today

Not only good-lookin
The girl was so smart
Can't beat her cooking
Ask me how I know
And I'll tell you so
She used to be my girl

I still love her
I'd place noone above her



I love this song but it irks me. The shoulda coulda wouldas been going on since the beginning of time and men still aint learned to take care of the woman while they together. Is it ego? Pride? Ignorance? Men I know its unfair but I can only write from a womans prospective so gwone somewhere..

















This song was made 40 years ago. Some man 40 years ago lost a woman and then sat on his ass, wrote a song professing his love and regret...after the fact. Where was this energy during the relationship? Now you standing around telling folks you used to hit..



Most of us do not care after the fact. In the past this has actually been hurtful because someone telling me this just let me know they knew what to do but they just chose not to do it. That's not endearing or helpful. It is a dagger drove deeper so keep it fellas. You are hearing this directly from a female. Just keep it... Sincere apologies work. Effort works. Empty words do not..



Disclaimer: I listened to this song on the way to work and this came to mind. Do not try to parallel this to my current life.



Lets talk. Comment, email, or send carrier pigeons..










Wednesday, December 12, 2018

We Yet Here

Hey you! Yea you...


Yes we are still doing our blog but life came at us fast so we had to focus on other things...
Meka's Grandson Javon

Leigh's Granddaughter Aria
We both were dealing with postpartum depression and had to take some time off. Don't question us about that either. 
There is a ton of stuff in the works and we look forward to getting this show back on the road. We appreciate everyone that has been supporting our Facebook page. You could have been anywhere in the world but you were on posts wasting time with us. 




Friday, June 8, 2018

Forward Fridays - Singrid M. Thompson

This Friday segment is dedicated to everyday people doing everyday things in our community. By recognizing these extraordinary people, we are looking to highlight their gifts, talents, contributions, and services available as well as encourage you to support, uplift and patronize them when you can. And maybe, it will inspire some, light a fire in others, to begin, step up and/or continue your own journeys to serve your community. 


Reach One. Teach One. Each One.

Meet
Singrid M. Thompson


I took a different approach to revamp my contribution to Forward Fridays. I love this lady. Our Parents were good friends but our Mothers were the BEST of friends. We realized as adults that they had the epitome of friendships and they showed us how to have longlasting friendships by example. We have kept in touch over the years. Even though Ms. Freddie passed away years ago, my Mother still keeps her close to heart and speaks of her with such fondness and love. But there are times that she speaks of her softly and with sadness. Her death left a hole in our hearts and a void in our lives but her love, life lessons and her way with words have remained and kept us all thus far.

Singrid and I spent a lot of time with each other as children and what's crazy to me is, I grew up and graduated with Singrid's sister Kena, because we are the same age and in my later years, "grew up" with Singrid since Kena had abandoned us by moving a few States away (j/k Kena - love you) lol. And what's crazier is, the kind of people that these two are (I didn't forget you Brother Dee - Heeeyyy), I've adopted their friends and associates and vice versa. I don't feel right calling them my friends. They are most definitely my family. And I don't play about 'em.

Before I get to the meat of this piece, I just want to give you a little more about what this young lady is to me. She prays with me and for me, she helps to correct my thinking (positive over negative), she takes my calls and texts all day and night lol. She allows me to dive in her inbox with foolishness. She often threatens to take my phone and send me to bed. But because she loves me. She puts up with my long-windedness :) She celebrates me. We share the same sense of humor as well. But mostly, she has helped me to grow as a person. But my view? My view of her & her growth, both personal and professional, has been nothing short of amazing. And I will continue to watch her, cheer her on, support her, love on her, celebrate her, pray for her and...dive in that inbox :) 

And her husband?

I've adopted him too lol but what I love most about him is how he supports my friend, how he loves my friend, how he still dates my friend, celebrates my friend and rolls up his sleeves to get in the trenches with my friend. He is THAT guy and I love him more for how he unconditionally loves my friend. You're the Co-MVP, Tavarus <3

Why we're here...

I reached out to Singrid for an interview about her business for Forward Fridays. I sent her the questions and she sent me the responses and it went a little something like this:

Good Morning, how are you? Let's dive right in, shall we? :)


Tell everyone your name, the name of your business and what it is that you do.

Singrid M Thompson, Licensed Esthetician and Makeup Artist, owner of iMakeUpMe Beauty & Skincare Spa located in the historic downtown Tuscaloosa Riverfront district 



1. What made you want to get into skin care?

I started as a makeup artist.  After doing so many different types of faces, I saw there was a major need to help educate women on how to take care of their skin and not just cover it up. I witnessed many women become so consumed with the temporary satisfaction of having flawless skin. I didn't want my clients to feel as if they could only be or feel beautiful when they wear makeup. 










2. Tell us a little bit about how you got started...

My career in the beauty industry started with a simple prayer, "God what is my purpose"? At the time, I had been working at my job for about 9 years. I felt like I was at a dead end. I wanted more out of life, so I prayed and asked God what would my next move be?  After receiving my answer (makeup artist), I then prayed for my name (iMakeUpMe). I have always liked makeup,  just never thought it would lead to my purpose. 

3. What services do you provide?

The services I provide include; customized facials with specialized services (microdermabrasion, Dermaplaning,  high frequency, LED light therapy), wax services for men and full body wax services for women, sugaring hair removal services,  and makeup application. We are the only spa in Tuscaloosa that offers the Yoni Steam or V Steam services administered by trained professionals. 














4. Can you tell us what areas that you are looking to branch out into?

I would love to branch into the medical side of esthetics.

5. Are your products all natural or mostly natural? 

My handmade products are all made with all natural ingredients with the exception of our body mist. It is mostly natural and our K & K Kollection body butter. It is made with cosmetic grade glitter. 
















5 1/2. What ingredients, if any, should we look for/look out for when dealing with anything that we put on our skin? 

Look for... 
Products that are made with water as its main (1st ingredients). If alcohol is the 1st ingredient, more than likely it's going to be too drying or harsh for your skin and for everyday use. 

Good alcohols such as acetyl, stearyl and cetearyl alcohols are fatty alcohols and can be beneficial for skin. 

Stay away from...
Parabens and sulfates.
When reading a label..any ingredient that is ending in  -paraben (Ethylparaben, Butylparaben etc..)
These products have been linked to causing cancer and other health complications 

5 3/4. What should we absolutely stay away from?

Parabens and sulfates 
















6. What advice would you give those that are looking to start their own business and/or their own skincare line?

I would encourage others who are looking to start their own business to do the following:

I, as a believer in God, would advise those who believe in God to seek Him first. 
Trust the entire process. 
Trust yourself. 
Just start somewhere. 
Don't let anyone without a vision kill your dream of becoming who you're destined to be. 
Surround yourself with positive, like-minded people. 
Don't be afraid to separate from those who you are comfortable with. 
There is more than one plan. Continue to go through the alphabet, even if you have to double up on the letters. 

As far as products go... 
Create a product that you would use even if no one bought it. 
Consistency is key. 
Don't compromise your product value just because others don't believe in it. 
And last but not least: Remember, Formula 409 was the one that made it. 

7. What's been the hardest part of being an entrepreneur?

The hardest part for me I would say would be............ That one time (at band camp lol ) when I temporarily took my eyes off of my own vision and compared it to what others were doing. This caused me to question my purpose. 

8. What are the pros of being an entrepreneur?

Doing what I love to do and seeing how I am making a difference in other people lives. I love educating and helping others who are interested in skin care. 















9. How important is it to you to keep up with latest trend and demand in this fickle world?

I am always aware of what the latest trends are.  I've never been a trend follower. I've always been one to think outside of all of the shapes. Taking risks and trying my own new things are all things I don't mind doing. When a trend comes or pops up, most of the time, I've tried it or have been exposed to it before it takes off. I'm just not one to ride the waves like that. Trends are too temporary for me.

10. Do you provide samples?

Yes for skincare and body butter (while supplies last)

















11. What are the pros/cons of a small business vs a chain retailer?

Small business... I can control the flow of my spa. I can customize my protocols and how I run my business. I have full creative control. It belongs to me. What I've worked for, is now working for me. 

Chain retailers- Everything is the same across the board. Your position is held over your head. 

12. What challenges do you face when being compared to national chains?

Unlike a national chain, I am the face of the company, the financial investor, the employee, the employer and consumer. 

Customers are more likely to support a national chain versus a smaller, independent chain because of their name. Consumers tend to question my services or service price faster than they will some of the more popular spas. 

As the first minority-owned spa in Tuscaloosa,  I know I've created a business that has exclusive services and products. Compared to the older spas in Tuscaloosa,  I may not have some of the exact expensive equipment that they have. However, the equipment and service products used in the spa are professional grade and State Board approved. 
Some people may overlook my spa because of this. 

I have found that I have to work 3 times as hard to convince people who are hesitant or easily influenced by popularity to support me. 

Lucky #13. - Lastly, tell us where to find you, your hours, phone number and your social media pages and/or website so that all your new fans and clients can find you?



iMakeUpMe Beauty & Skincare 

PHONE: 205-222-9585

HOURS: 
TUES/ THUR 9AM-6:30PM
WED/FRI.   9AM-5PM
SAT 10AM-5PM

SOCIAL MEDIA

All @Imakeupme

She's not only my friend but I am also a client. Chances are, if you're close enough to me, you will smell heavenly scented products of iMakeUpMe. I am also a willing test dummy. I know she won't do anything to hurt me but what I find unmatched is the care that she has for her clients. She takes her time, she explains everything and she's about her business. And it's not just her, I must give a shout out to her amazing team as well. In her absence, they've treated me like family. And that's why I'll return again and again. 

I can't repay her for what she has poured into me but I can show her by continuing my patronage and something that doesn't cost me a dime: sharing her statuses, her work, her specials and her services. Believe me, I would love to keep her to myself so that she's not out of whatever I'm looking for or she's not already booked. But that would be selfish of me and a grave disservice to her to not share her. We are quick to call out businesses for their bad customer service, products, etc and we are quiet as a church mouse when things go well. Refer a friend today. I highly recommend mine.

Thank you for your time Singrid. And yes, I stalked your social media for these pix LOL!! Keep going, keep growing, allow God to continue to enlarge your vision. Stay focused and stay the course. He'll never steer you wrong. I know you will continue to be successful and I look to forward to cheering you on as you continue to grow. The community needs you & we here at Organized Foolishness salute you!








If you are at the New Orleans Natural Hair Expo, stop by to see the iMakeUpMe team. And yes, she does shipping!!


























Don't forget about dad. Get the special guy in your life the gift of relaxation for father's day. Only $75

Purchase online or stop by the spa. 
This sale ends June 16th.





___________________________________

To nominate someone to be 
featured on Fridays, please email us at foolishnessorganized@gmail.com 
along with a write-up letting us know 
why you would like us to recognize this person 
and include pictures. And stay tuned for a new person featured every Friday!